09.12.2023 | Review of “The Idea of You”

On Goodreads the novel “The Idea of You” by Robinne Lee comes with mixed reviews, most of them good but also a few scathing negative ones. What can I say? I had a wonderful time reading it and I did not expect this story to stay with me the way it did. I expected an interesting, slightly unique, but still mostly easy-going romance, with the typical “will they? / won’t they?” and typical tropes of roadblocks but still leading up to a happily ever after. And in parts it is exactly that and in so many parts it so very much isn’t. 

Excpert from "The Idea of You"
“Be still my heart” 🙂

The premise is easily explained: Solene is a 39 year olds divorcee in LA, who takes her teenage daughter to a meet & greet with the boyband August Moon, where she meets 20 years old Hayes Campbell, the leading male band member. The attraction is instant and then a flirt turns into one-night-stand turns into a fling turns into a secret affair turns into a public relationship turns into…. 

Unrealistic premise? A little bit maybe, but I allow that in a novel more often than not. One thing that made me roll my eyes a bit and kept me from giving this five stars was that this attraction and romance could only work, because both Solene and Hayes were not the typical regular American middleclass mum or boy in a boyband, but more sophisticated. Solene’s parents are French professors at ivy league colleges, she runs a high-class art gallery in LA, jet-sets to various art fairs and events all over the world. Hayes and all the other boys in the band come from a rather posh background, public school, cultured, bound for Oxford or Cambridge and all that. Sometimes it all felt a bit too posh, the places they meet, the events they go to, the world they move in.

Another aspect that turned me off a tiny bit was that towards the end there was a bit much of complaining about sexism and misogyny and how women still have it harder in so many aspects of life. I agree and I get it, but I didn’t need it shoved down my throat as much as it felt like in last half or so of this story.

Apart from all of that though? OMG, this story broke my heart into tiny little pieces. Because spoiler alert: Of course there wasn’t a happily ever after. There never could have been as much as I’d rooted for them as both characters grew on me quickly. I rooted for Solene to follow through on the mutual attraction, because no-one would bat an eyelash if the gender roles were reversed and it were a 40 year old man hooking up with someone like Posh Spice. In the beginning even I caught myself thinking for millisecond “Is this weird? Does that feel icky?”. Deep-rooted internal misogyny at play here. They were two consenting adults. That’s all that matters. 

I loved that at the heart of the underlying and ongoing conflict wasn’t solely the age difference, but the fact, that a relationship between a guy in a super-successful (boy)band with fans camping outside the hotel and millions of followers on social media and a woman who is not part of the entertainment industry (art gallery or not) is doomed to fail. These kind of pop and rock stars lead such a different life and to me the story excels at portraying that realistically. I’m old enough to have witnessed the public and media frenzy about bands in the past decades. The current Robbie Williams documentary on Netflix also gave me some idea of that that life is like.

Here it was the paparazzi capturing the secret relationship after all, the unwanted attention Solene receives once the story gets out. The hate mail from rabid fans, the death threats. But also the bullying Isabelle, the teenage daughter has to endure once the story breaks, which is a big part of why Solene ends the relationship. There is one moment towards the end where the age difference comes into play quite starkly, when Solene encounters a crying underaged girl in the hotel hallway in the middle of the night. The girl had lied about her age to hook up with one of the other band members. Solene gets into full mother-mode to help the girl, while Hayes only worries about possible implication for the band and himself if this comes out. And both sides are equally valid from their respective points of view and where they both are in their lives at that time. And in the end that was the clincher: Hayes – as much as he was in love with Solene – still had so much to learn and to grow to be able to become the man he could be.

I will re-read parts of this story tonight. That’s how much my mind is still reeling with it. Oh and the fact that I was fantasizing about what I would have loved to see happen after. Not in a happy-end for them together, but a happy-end for either of them a decade later and both of them acknowledging what lead them to this. My mind was spinning with picturing elaborate scenarios to the extent that I decided to not just keep daydreaming about it, but trying to write it down. Fanfic for a novel? Never done that before, but that won’t stop me. Wish me luck…

09.12.2023 | Favourite Operation Mincemeat Lyric(s)

This morning when I checked Twitter for the first time in a few days I saw this

and knew I’d had to write a quick response post, because I can’t put my reply to this in just one tweet. How could anyone? And what defines “favourite” anyway? The lyric you can most relate to? The one that moves you the most? The one that is the most witty? The one you think is the most beautifully crafted?

I tried to narrow it down and sort of categorize them. My picks also might change as soon as tomorrow depending on my mood, but here we go:

My favourite witty ones for their word play and rhythm and audacity

For fortune favours bravery
And a fortune’s what I’ve got

Look up victory in the dictionary
There’s a picture there of me

Foreigners aren’t great coroners, see
And no-one in Spain is as clever as me

My favourite one for modern-day relevance

You think we’re badass? You ain’t seen nothing
Democracy, you won’t see us coming

The ones I could/can relate to the most, both from “Dead in the Water”, which my ” ‘I Want’ Song” as much as it is Charles’.

But it’s part of my biology to start with an apology

One day I’ll metamorphosize
The scales shall tumble from their eyes
And thus shall end this wretched old routine

And then there are the many many inspirational ones

But life is much more pleasant when you’re living in the present

It’s no life if you’re forgetting to live

and of course

Set your hearts to the horizon
Leave your fears upon the shore

Photo of a silver bracelet on a black cloth. Bracelet inscribed with "leave your fears upon the shore" in capital letters
Lyrical Bracelet

Thanks to my tendency to do long write-ups for events I loved, I knew there was at least one memorable lyric which was lost over time. For good reason probably, but I still have fond memories of it, because it stayed with me for a while. From a previous version of “All the Ladies”

Stage a coup
For your mothers and your sisters too

And while I’m at: Can I have moment of remembrance for “Let Me Die in Velvet” and the audacity to rhyme pretentious with trenches ? That definitely would have made this list 😉

01.11.2023 | Travelling Fangirl Reprise

When I got back to writing posts about my post-lockdown travel to Frank Turner gigs in April 2022 I was too emotional obviously to use the old “Travelling Fangirl” title for those. So it’s about time for a reprise.

Last Thursday I got in my car to drive north for about 650 km. That night I picked up friends at the airport in Billund, Denkmark and the day(s) after we drove rollercoaster, fought out “Ninja Battles” (I lost every time), strolled through Miniland and fangirled over all things LEGO.

LEGO Built dragon sculputres at a water ride at LEGOLAND
Dragons at LEGOLAND
View over Miniland at LEGOLand
View over Miniland
Photo of a 3-store-high Lego tree inside the LEGO House
Tree inside the LEGO House

On Saturday we drove another ~ 270 km to Copenhagen. We stopped about halfway in Odense to visit the Hans Christian Andersen museum, which was wonderful place. I realized that even though I know the basic of his stories, I never ever have read one.

a circular building with lots of glass and wood, part of the Andersen Museum in Odense. A few trees with mostly red coloured leaves in the foreground.
The beautiful building of the Andersen museum in Odense
Beautifully crafted medal sculpture spelling out Traekfugl. This word and Bird of Passage and a chinese sign is shown below it
Title of one section
Model birds taking flight inside the museum
Inside the Andersen Museum

Sunday we spend some time at the National Museum of Denmark in Copenhagen and waited for the rain to pass, which it only did temporarily. We strolled through Copenhagen a bit, up the Round Tower, down to Nyhavn and got properly drenched on the walk back to the hotel.

Sun Chariot
the Sun Chariot illustrates the idea that the sun was drawn on its eternal journey by a divine horse.
View over Copenhagen from the Round Tower. In the background Öresund-Bridge is visible
view from Rundetårn
Photo of Nyhavn, Copenhagen: sailboats docked, colourful houses in the background
Nyhavn

I’m glad I had packed a 2nd pair of shoes, because later that night we walked over to a concert venue to see the guy, we travelled here to see. Frank Turner! This time in duo format with the brilliantly talented Matt Nasir on mandolin.

Photo of Matt Nasir on mandoline and Frank Turner with a guitar on stage. In the middle foreground is a raised arm in the shadow
Frank and Matt on stage

And what can I say: it’s always, ALWAYS such a joy to see Frank sing some songs. To entertain. To make the people in the crowd sing and dance and laugh and feel all the feels. I do at least, but that’s a given when he sings about all that stuff I relate to so much and that his songs helped me work through. Or at least started to make me work through. I will probably forever well up a bit, when Frank does his intro to “Haven’t Been Doing So Well”. When he talks about his own mental health and how long it took him to ask for help and how much better his life is now, because he did. Because that particular song played quite a big role for me to finally do the same. So yeah, I might have been a bit emotional.

It was a fun night with a great selection of songs, amusing banter on stage and a bit of improv, when a string broke on Frank’s guitar and they had to play a song accompanied just by mandolin, while the guitar was fixed “behind the scenes”.

Photo of Matt Nasir on mandoline and Frank Turner without a guitar on stage. Frank is smiling. In the foreground there are a few clapping hands
“Live and Let Die” without a guitar

We hung around after the show for a while hoping to be able to catch the guys and our persistence paid off. We got our Frank hug, were able to chat for a bit and went back to our hotel with our souls and hearts filled to the brim. Mine anyway.

One last thing I definitely feel worth sharing especially regarding the mental health part I mentioned above. A few things didn’t work out as planned this weekend. Some by chance, some by my own mistake, some just bad luck. Two years ago either of these would have most probably put me in a tailspin of self-loathing and worry and possibly would have ruin parts of this trip for me. None of that this time. Or at least not anything I couldn’t squash down quickly. I’m so glad I had been following Frank’s advice in early 2022 and “admitted that I could use a little help”.