A Few Words on Frank Turner’s “Somewhere Inbetween”

As long as I can remember I have been a person of words. Reading. Writing. Talking. Though the latter needs the addendum that I’ve always been a bit shy around people I don’t know (yet). If I’m on a familiar / friendly terms with you it might happen that I talk a lot, that I talk fast and that I won’t shut up.

A long time ago I tried to explain why many of Frank’s lyrics resonate with me the way they do:

All of a sudden there were these songs – these words to be exact – that touched me on so many levels, because I could relate to so many of the emotions or situations he was singing about. [….] because these words express what I feel or have felt at some point so much better than I ever could.

When I was writing about some of Frank’s words before, I usually was able to express in depth in my own words how and why his words resonate with me. To reference my own experience in my own words. To share my thoughts and emotions in my own words.

Until “Somewhere Inbetween”.

This song and these words are something I feel deep down in my bones and in every fibre of my being. I can’t find the (right) words to tell you why. And trust me, I tried. In so many words and so many different ways. The song has been released two months ago and I spent quite a bit of that time to think so many thoughts about it. To start draft after draft of this post. For now though I’ve decided to abandon the idea to explain in depth and in my own words why these lyrics resonate with me so incredibly much.

“All my fucking life” I’ve been struggling with lack of self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, tons of self-doubt and everything that comes with it. To some extent I still struggle with it and just slowly with help of therapy I did in 2022/2023 and with work I need to keep doing on myself, I’ve managed to understand some of the causes and to start finding ways to overcome some of it.

My self-doubt and lack of self-esteem have been telling me for so long to “put on a show” of being an accomplished and trouble-free child / teenager / adult. They only rarely allow(ed) me to share my doubts and fears and struggles and often also not allowed me to share my ideas, my wishes or my needs with others, because self-doubt and a lack of self-esteem tell me I don’t deserve to do that. Self-doubt and lack of self-esteem still also question many of the positive things that are said or happen to me. Even with the positive things I facilitate for myself or others, I still doubt that I can own that accomplishment or that I deserve it.

Knowing the concept of imposter-syndrome in theory doesn’t magically erase the doubts and struggles, let me tell you.

“Putting on a show” can be so isolating. Battling imposter-syndrome is so exhausting. And this song describes all these struggles so perfectly. There is nothing left for me to add. Except to thank Frank from the bottom of my heart for putting this deeply personal experience into a beautiful song and for releasing this song into the world. To thank Frank for sharing his vulnerability with us and for finding the perfect words to capture these difficult emotions. And by doing so help me to articulate (to myself at least) more of my own emotions as well.

I have no idea how visceral I’ll react to see and hear this song at my next gig! I might turn into a weepy mess at the barrier. Be that as it may, I can’t wait to hear and experience it live in October.