15.11.2021 | “Send Me Back To Sleep…”

Lyrics: “Back To Sleep” ~ Frank Turner, 2008

Just a sort of placeholder post with not much content, because I need to go to bed soon. I awoke way too early again and didn’t fall back to sleep. Lots of coffee helped a bit. Maybe?

For the first time since early March 2020 we did a everyone on board team meeting. In Real Life! We had to talk about restructuring our data storage system on our server, because it has evolved into quite a mess over the past 20 or so years. We’ve got staff retiring soon and new staff on board already and we need to overhaul the whole thing. Easier said than done, but today might have been a good start. Anyway, we thought this would be best done in a room together and not online on shared screens. Plus… we wanted to get everyone at one (large) conference table at least once before one of my coworker retires in a few weeks. We had another coworker retire last December and the pandemic ruined every kind of planned farewell party / gathering. Who would have thought we’d be stuck in the same mess a year on?

The large conference table wasn’t available in our headquarter so we did the workshop someplace else this morning and I went back to the office afterwards. Another coworker gave me a drive in the company car, so I was able to leave my car at that first place and not pay double parking fees. All I had to do was to take the tram back down after work and pick up my car. All in all it might have cost me 10 more minutes of commute but it was fine. I could use the time in the tram to catch up on my social media, which I hadn’t been able to do all day. Win win. It was the first time I used my new public transport pass, which our company subsides immense. I finally signed up for it, because I was and still am planning to use a combination of car and public transport at least once or twice a week. Not as long as the pandemic is still raging on, but hopefully soon afterwards. And it was ok to be back on the tram for the first time in 20 months. Everyone wore a mask, most of them even wore it correctly. I might still not dare venturing out during regular early morning rush hour and crowded carriages any time soon.

I don’t want to get started how frustrated I am with the way we handle or not handle the pandemic over here in Germany. It’s equally infuriating and heartbreaking and the constant change from one emotion to the other is giving me whiplash. So to speak. I’m done…. Or maybe I’m just extremely tired today?

Happy, relaxing thoughts… here is a picture of a beach…

Sunset at Balnakeil Beach, Scotland, 2016
Sunset at Balnakeil Beach, Scotland, 2016

14.11.2021 | “I’ve Been Lost More Than Found…”

Lyrics: “Little Changes” ~ Frank Turner, 2018

Now that I’m finally back among the living, let’s do another prompt post. To be honest, I was back among the living at Thursday already, but I had a sick not for the whole week and I didn’t work and and I was in a bit of a funk (again), so I didn’t feel inclined to write a post here either.

Ancestors | The general state of our loved one in the nursing home seems to have gotten worse over the past few days. I hadn’t visited all week, because of the sick note, so the change from last weekend to this one was rather obvious to me. It breaks my heart. There isn’t much we can do, except get in touch with their GP once again and ask them to come out for a visit and have a closer look themselves. When I left the nursing home yesterday – holding back tears once again – I drove off to run some errands. I wasn’t in the mood for any kind of music, so I switched back to the podcast I started listening to some time ago: “The Way Out is In” about the teachings of a buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh. The episode I was listening to was about ancestors and what they teach us and how we can / shall deal with our relation to them. That sort of thing. And boy, did that one hit home, because of course with the current situation family and elders and such were on my mind a lot. How to deal with it all, especially if there is so much emotional baggage around it all as well. I don’t have a solution yet. Except to be more mindful and pay more attention and be more introspective about some things…

Outlander (Book and TV) | I used quite a lot of the time at home – once I wasn’t just feeling zombie like – re-reading or skimming through in parts – the 8th book of the Outlander series, because book #9 will be out in 9 days. I’m excited about this and it was really good that I got caught up on the latest development in book 8. So much has happened. In fact at some point I thought I should get out book 7 as well to remember what led to the events in book 8. Anyway, all in all on the 2nd read I thought book 8 was a solid part of the story. It dragged on a bit and on the other hand not that much happened. I really didn’t like to see Bree and Roger apart for most of the storyline. But they won’t be anymore in book 9. Just like the first time I read the book, I’m still most interested in how it will go on for William. When I had finished reading book 8 I realized I still hadn’t re-watched season 5 of Outlander on TV. I didn’t like that season all that much, because they changed quite a bit from the book canon. But same rules apply: I should / need to refresh my memory before the next season will be on TV next year, so I watched a few episodes of Season 5 as well.

A few of the events in the book happened around “Craigh na Dun” and that is reason enough to post this photo again.

"Craigh na Dun" (without the stones)
“Craigh na Dun” (without the stones), 2016

Work From Home | I had put in a request to be allowed to work from home for a 2 days per week even after the pandemic and I finally got the paperwork back. Yes I logged into my work email once or twice this week, even though I was off sick. But better to get a early handle on the inbox. There is quite a bit of forms to fill out and list to check off to get the request granted. Among other things photos of my desk / chair etc to see if it’s all according to my works’ health and safety conditions. Which was a good reason to get the desk a bit more in order and to maybe rearrange things a bit to make it look more proper. We’ll see… I guess the “work from home as much as possible” agreement due to the pandemic will be extend till the new year anyway…

Misc | Not much else going on. I took it easy these past few days. Tried to get enough rest. Chill. Be a bit more Zen about things. Which isn’t always easy. Little Changes and all that…

08.11.2021 | Girl Down! Repeat! Girl Down!

On second thought it probably isn’t the real flu, but a sever, feverish cold, rhinovirus and all and nothing the flu shot could have prevented. My GP still put me on sick leave for the week. And the way I’m just dozing in bed or zombie like move around the kitchen to stock up on fluids, that’s probably for the best.

I hate being sick. I often feel guilty about not a) not being able to work as work is really busy right now and b) for getting sick in the first place. Stupid, stupid, stupid, I know…

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